Thank you! I'm grateful to have been able to pay for great therapy - and the VA prolonged exposure protocol is amazing for PTSD if anyone else needs something. It was hard work, but I don't have flashbacks anymore.
Sadly, dad was a pedophile who was taught that he was the 2nd coming of Jesus at 8 (yes, the town even prayed to him, it was the 40's backwoods Alabama) - no wonder he became a malignant narcissist.
Wow, what a great idea!! I love this, sure, feel free to link me. Will you be posting an article once that page is updated with links? I can't wait to find others like me. I felt so alone for so long.
Kelly, your language traverses both worlds, the one before and the one after. Maybe a few more. You're fluent in the language of separation—"a peculiar people"—and the isolation and loneliness that goes with it, symptom of "not being of this world." And you speak the language of people who have never entered the world of religion. Most comforting to me is the language of experience, the world we can all return to when we feel ourselves gripping something that doesn't serve. You call it falling. I call it taking in water. Thank you for taking the time to translate your experience into a breadcrumb trail for others just like us. THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH US, AND THERE NEVER WAS.
Laury, what an eloquent and generous comment. I feel seen and, as you know, that is pretty momentous for those with our backgrounds. I’m so touched by your words and thank you for listening - for your attention and presence. Much love.
Love this. Accepting what is. The sheer horror turns, drops into life, to love, to truth. Simple truth, deep and wave after wave of profound. Years of it.
Kelly, your life experience so resonates with me! Much of our life experience has been dissimilar, but the most significant, central parts have been alike. I believe we are about the same age. I was born into the 2x2 system, and left it in the fall of 2023 after the revelations of rampant abuse, corruption and hypocrisy. Like you, from childhood, I have always been intense, curious and seeking. As a young teenager, I had a profoundly spiritual experience (not a physiological NDE) in which I felt infused and saturated with LOVE, WARMTH, WELL-BEING and JOY. I experienced that as the presence of God, God making Himself real to me. I wanted to keep those feelings alive within myself. The memory of that experience has remained with me all of my life, and has been my anchor in times of loneliness and despair. The power of those feelings has been proof to me, that a spiritual connection is real, that God is real. My understanding has evolved, such that I no longer identify with religion (systems of men), but with spirituality; an essential connection with a higher power, which for me, is God. That long-ago experience remains as the foundation of my reality. Hearing your story about your near-death-experience, has raised a question for me, regarding my own similar experience which happened a short time after I was baptized at convention, a symbolic death experience. I never before thought of my experience as a near-death-experience, but perhaps it was? Your story was so interesting and impactful for me! Thank you for sharing it!
Wow, Sara. Trying to find words. Yes, you recognize what I experienced because you did too. We always know each other. I am so moved by your comment. After decades of isolation it is quite miraculous to connect with other ex2x2 survivors but especially one with this shared experience. We are so fortunate. It takes my breath away. “The foundation of your reality” as the NDE I had is mine. Systems of men have nothing to do with it. Thank you.
I look forward to listening to your ep with Mike this coming weekend
Meanwhile, the post is a quick read!
Thank you @Dr. Bronce Rice
It's scary what a blind faith will cause "good" people to do. https://jmeleepharmd.substack.com/p/she-was-thirteen
Excellent post. Religious trauma and abuse. I’m so sorry. 😭
Thank you! I'm grateful to have been able to pay for great therapy - and the VA prolonged exposure protocol is amazing for PTSD if anyone else needs something. It was hard work, but I don't have flashbacks anymore.
Sadly, dad was a pedophile who was taught that he was the 2nd coming of Jesus at 8 (yes, the town even prayed to him, it was the 40's backwoods Alabama) - no wonder he became a malignant narcissist.
Check out the High Control Groups: Resources and Support for Survivors tab on my home page to see if you’d like your Substack linked.
Wow, what a great idea!! I love this, sure, feel free to link me. Will you be posting an article once that page is updated with links? I can't wait to find others like me. I felt so alone for so long.
It’s under construction/in progress - I’ll save a link to add ❤️🔥
Kelly, your language traverses both worlds, the one before and the one after. Maybe a few more. You're fluent in the language of separation—"a peculiar people"—and the isolation and loneliness that goes with it, symptom of "not being of this world." And you speak the language of people who have never entered the world of religion. Most comforting to me is the language of experience, the world we can all return to when we feel ourselves gripping something that doesn't serve. You call it falling. I call it taking in water. Thank you for taking the time to translate your experience into a breadcrumb trail for others just like us. THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH US, AND THERE NEVER WAS.
Laury, what an eloquent and generous comment. I feel seen and, as you know, that is pretty momentous for those with our backgrounds. I’m so touched by your words and thank you for listening - for your attention and presence. Much love.
Love this. Accepting what is. The sheer horror turns, drops into life, to love, to truth. Simple truth, deep and wave after wave of profound. Years of it.
Thank you.
Yes
Great discussion and also- Those glasses are 🔥
Faith, that ignores harm is only atmosphere
Excellent writing
Thank you, Kelly
Thank you Prajna!
Kelly, your life experience so resonates with me! Much of our life experience has been dissimilar, but the most significant, central parts have been alike. I believe we are about the same age. I was born into the 2x2 system, and left it in the fall of 2023 after the revelations of rampant abuse, corruption and hypocrisy. Like you, from childhood, I have always been intense, curious and seeking. As a young teenager, I had a profoundly spiritual experience (not a physiological NDE) in which I felt infused and saturated with LOVE, WARMTH, WELL-BEING and JOY. I experienced that as the presence of God, God making Himself real to me. I wanted to keep those feelings alive within myself. The memory of that experience has remained with me all of my life, and has been my anchor in times of loneliness and despair. The power of those feelings has been proof to me, that a spiritual connection is real, that God is real. My understanding has evolved, such that I no longer identify with religion (systems of men), but with spirituality; an essential connection with a higher power, which for me, is God. That long-ago experience remains as the foundation of my reality. Hearing your story about your near-death-experience, has raised a question for me, regarding my own similar experience which happened a short time after I was baptized at convention, a symbolic death experience. I never before thought of my experience as a near-death-experience, but perhaps it was? Your story was so interesting and impactful for me! Thank you for sharing it!
Wow, Sara. Trying to find words. Yes, you recognize what I experienced because you did too. We always know each other. I am so moved by your comment. After decades of isolation it is quite miraculous to connect with other ex2x2 survivors but especially one with this shared experience. We are so fortunate. It takes my breath away. “The foundation of your reality” as the NDE I had is mine. Systems of men have nothing to do with it. Thank you.